Skype Satsang with Mohanji in Serbia on 26th October, 2013
Q: I would like to ask about free will and decisions in everyday life. To be spontaneous and be like a river is an imperative of our spiritual life, but we cannot be totally passive in that. We sometimes have to do something with all respect for god’s will. Even if we have faith in existence, we are in position to act, but we often have dilemma, whether to go right or left. So, how to cover this gap? Could you tell us about free will in everyday life?
A: Free will in everyday life is more or less like a myth. When we were in our last life, we gathered a lot of emotions, desires, understandings, misunderstandings. All these things put together created karma in this life. Before we started this journey, before we took this birth, we clearly decided, these are desires, these are emotions, these are materials that we want to experience in this new life. When we thus decided, we almost completely gave up free will. Because we chose from our first heartbeat to our last heartbeat, where we will be born, to which kind of parents, what sort of experiences, the place, the education, relationships, all these things we actually decided before we came here. This is why we are born in a particular place, to a particular set of parents, and we have certain taste, education, some people like to do yoga, some people like to do sports, play tennis… all these qualities, all these characteristics we chose before we came. That is why our children have distinct characteristics. They are very clear about what they want, more or less they have a clear character. This is because they had chosen it before. So, to live now, the understanding we need to have is that whatever we are experiencing today, is what we have chosen. And whatever we will experience tomorrow, is what we have chosen. At the same time, we can choose one thing: we can chose not to accumulate more desires, more emotions while we are living. This is our advantage, this is free will. If you want to stop accumulating more desires and more emotions, i.e. you should have complete understanding about your daily life, your now. That means acceptance of every day as it is and no resistance, no storage of emotions, whatever comes to us just let it come and go. We remain always clean and pure. If we can operate on that level, there will be no accumulation of new desires and new emotions. That is exactly our free will. Our free will today is not to have further emotions, further desires. When we are enjoying and experiencing everyday activity, our mind is completely here, in the present, enjoying that activity fully and experiencing an event fully, completely, so that we are satisfied, fulfilled each moment, that is exactly the free will that we have.
There is also one more thing. When you lose interest in something and you say, “Ok, I had enough of this experience, I’m fine, I’m happy,” including relationship, that desire and that emotion also get dropped. That is also a free will while living. This is the only free will we can operate on because we have chosen our lifespan, how long we will live, we have chosen our activity and all the qualities of our activity, our character, our shape, country, culture, even the food we consume, the taste we enjoy, all these things were decided before.
So, your free will is: 1. do not accumulate any more, 2. you can always grow over an emotion, grow over a taste and say, “I had sufficient of it, I don’t need any more,” that
drops off so that you are liberated more and more. Each moment you can liberate yourself.
Q: You said we should accept everything that comes our way, and that we should totally accept it, then you said something about enjoying it, but what if the experience is very bad or very painful, should we also totally accept that?
A: If an experience is painful, understand where the pain exists. The pain exists only in waking state mind. It cannot be translated into your dream state, nor can it be moved to your deep sleep state. The mind which is conditioned with so much of our education, culture, upbringing basically, that is the mind which gives the suffering. Emotional suffering is always related to mind. But we can understand, “Ok, this is coming and going, but we are not bound by people, personalities, time, space, situations, country, culture, nothing. Because we just experience that. We are experiencing and we are moving on. As an effect, nothing can bind us, nothing can conquer us, because we are free, right from birth to death.” But mind does not allow us to be free most of the time. Mind will say, “This is injustice, this should not happen. This should be different.” And we always manipulate based on mind’s opinions. That is the time when suffering happens. Otherwise, we could say, “Ok, I had a relationship which was not my taste, it didn’t suit me. Let me go away.” Like that, we can step aside and watch the whole show. At that point in time, we are very powerful. We cannot be defeated. Mind actually pulls us down but if we use our intellect and understand that all these things are passing and they cannot bind us, with that clear understanding if you move, everything is just experience. Everything is just experience, there is no pepper or salt in it.
Q: If free will is a myth, what is the purpose of life then? Why are we here? If everything is predestined, what are we doing here, on the Earth?
A: Simple, what you are experiencing today, that experience is what you have chosen. That is why you are here. It is almost like an automatic mode. We have clear understanding of all our thoughts, words, actions, and we do not keep emotions with them, we will not come back. But what happens is we resist, we have anger, we have anxiety, we have fear, we have love, it’s all a mixture of all these, and this comes out as desire. For example, one man is telling a woman, “I love you so much! I would like to be your son in the next life” or “If only I was your son!” The desire becomes very strong and the relationship has to materialize in another life. This is how we create our destiny. Likewise, two people are fighting, and one person says, “I will kill you! I will surely kill you!” and they become very angry with each other. But if they could not complete that anger with each other or sort it out, unconsciously they will come back again in the next life as brothers or brother and sister, or father and son… and there will be a big fight in the family, because the anger transferred. So, unconsciously we are creating our destiny, and when after our death from this life we are preparing for the next life, this agenda we have, of our desires, of what we would like to achieve within one lifetime. This is clearly defined and decided and laid out in that plane between the death and the new birth. That is the time when the whole format is made. And while the format is being made you have full free will, only free will. But once you say, “This is what I want to do, I’ve created my agenda” and then you close it, you cannot change it. So, unconsciously we are creating our lifetimes. But while living, we never understand that. People cannot meet if there is no karma behind it. You will not listen to me if there is no karma behind it.
Q: Does soul have to experience all that?
A: Soul does not experience, soul is like a petrol in the car, it just helps the journey. It is not deciding the destination. Each soul has a different set of experience because each soul operates a different body. The same food will be different for different people, some people say this is good, some people say this is not good. Food is the same, but the taste is different. That is why each soul operates as a different machine, different body.
Q: I was in a conflict with someone and I’m aware of our different opinions, different attitudes towards life, and I try to detach, but that person is attached to me. Do I have to be born again just because that person is emotionally involved with me?
A: Yes, actually this is the complication of life. Maybe you got out of it, but that other person may not have got out of it. It is important to nurture it in such a way that you slowly have to take his hand and put it somewhere else. You have to divert that person’s attention to something else. Because what happens is, one person is completely relieved or detached, but the other person still holds on. It means the hook is still on your flesh so it is important to detach slowly, slowly with understanding, awareness, and make them feel just like the mother slowly, slowly detaches the child from having the milk, similarly you have to slowly, slowly detach that person. People are children.
Q: The more I try, the angrier or the more frustrated he gets.
A: You have to handle it carefully because this is life and emotion. Make that person realize that this is over…as if somebody dies and goes. What would you do? You cannot do anything, right? That stops there. Like that, we have to handle the relationship in such a way that the other person is very clear that it cannot continue or change the pattern of relationship. For example, suddenly you become motherly or something else, that doesn’t suit the other person and the person says, “Ok, now the relationship has changed.” Like certain people after divorce continue to be good friends, so the old emotions do not exist any more. I’ve seen many people like that. We have to turn the relationship in such a way that it relieves you, detaches you, liberates you.
Q: If someone has a health problem in this life which is a problem from past life, does this person have to suffer from this illness the whole life or can he or she be somehow healed?
A: I would say that both if somebody does something good to you, try to compensate in some way. I normally pay people or do something for them if they do something for me, so that it gets equalized. Likewise, if it’s hurt, I wouldn’t recommend hurting the other person because that continues. If somebody hurts you, you hurt them back, then again they hurt you… Because this is an ego issue. My suggestion is that the best thing to counter any kind of hurt is through love. You can definitely say if you are happy, by doing this if you feel satisfied. Or we can deal with the whole situation with lot more maturity, using the brain, so that it stops there. I was telling one person who was writing a letter saying a lot of bad things about the other person. I suggested a reply saying, “Thank you very much for letting me know, but my love cannot change.” That stopped the communication. There is no further argument, no further discussion. So it is better to cut short something negative as early as possible. But the good thing, make it continue.
Physical illness is a result of emotions. When you trap emotions, it becomes physical later. It is important to let go, relax and leave it, so that even the diseases may not materialize or manifest, as much as you could. Many times diseases are kept and captured by emotions, our mind.
Bless You All
Transcribed by Biljana V.