Weekend Programme with Mohanji ‘Return to Yourself’, Serbia, 3-4 Oct, 2015; day 1, part 1
Forgiveness vs. letting go
Q: How to forgive the near and dear ones, e.g. my mother who is a wonderful person but has always rejected me?
A: Why do you have to forgive?
Q: I have some resentment and sometimes tears come back.
A: Where is the forgiveness coming from? What is there to forgive? And who are you to forgive?
Q: To rephrase the question, how can I relieve myself from this situation?
A: That is the right way. I asked this just to open your mind to this idea. There is a meditation of forgiveness, just a play of mind. In Buddhism, there is a method to visualise a person who you do not like or have a problem with, and when the face comes in front, wipe it with your hand. It will come back again and again. After some time if you do it, you will not even remember the face of the person. This is a psychological thing.
But I would say this is all manipulating our mind. The mind says we must forgive this person. There is a bit of ego element in it – me forgiving somebody. I never recommend that because you are giving some food to the ego. Instead, the most powerful thing is to let go. Then mind is used less. Forgiveness is unreal, just a play of the mind. Letting go is real. Just let go, ok, allow it to happen. When children play pranks or do things that you don’t like, you tell them this is not good, but again you allow them to be themselves. If you continuously let go, there will be nothing stored inside. Whether it is good or bad, keep letting go. Let it happen. Then you will start accepting things. When there is acceptance, there is no need for forgiveness. We will accept everybody as they are because we cannot change them.
But we can change ourselves by letting go. If you do not give much energy to the mind or ego, you will be humble and that will bring a change in the other person. When you are very humble, it will have a powerful effect in the world. When you resist or react, the opposition stays equally powerful. When you love and let go, everything melts. Everything that happened last minute should be forgotten so that we are always like a fresh baby. And if you live like that, life is so easy. This is spiritual life. Just be.
Q: I read about this, but how to apply it, e.g. if somebody attacks you, you cannot meditate and do yoga in the street?
A: You read things, meditated and are doing all these things outside of you. How do you take this inside you? We are always in the doing mode. Information is collected like consuming food- you may eat a lot of food, but if your stomach cannot digest it, it’s absolutely useless. “I’ve collected all this information, give me something new.” You collect that too. Consuming a lot of food causes physical obesity, collection a lot of emotions gives emotional obesity and collecting a lot of information which we cannot use gives intellectual obesity. It makes you rigid and inflexible. If you take one decision right now, “I will give much more to the earth than I take from it,” life will change. It is not spirituality, just practical life. We are collectors- collecting so much information, food, materials from the earth. Whatever you collect intellectually goes to the grave when you die. It’s all wasted here. On the other hand, when you consume little food and digest it, gradually there will be a huge transformation inside.
I normally tell people two things. One is whatever you speak, make sure your mind is completely there. No absent-minded talking. Secondly, whatever action you do, make sure your mind is present. Just be mindful with your words and action. Eventually you will also be conscious of your thoughts. You will know how the thoughts are flowing through your mind. It will preserve your energy because you are within your aura field. It makes you really powerful and shifts you from dependency on other things, people, materials, places, information… They are all outside of you. And if they are complementary to our life, it’s ok. If they are not complementing to your life, you do not need it. So, the food is in the kitchen. Unless it comes to the table, we can’t use it. Likewise there is a lot of information, materials, places, people but they are not useful for us unless we experience them.
Awareness is a continuous, everyday process. I do not recommend meditation to everybody because meditation sometimes becomes mechanical and thus useless. Some people say, “I meditated long hours” then I know there is a problem at home otherwise you don’t meditate like that – you don’t want to talk to anybody so you sit in some quiet corner.
So a few words, a few actions but with awareness, will fundamentally transform you from inside. And you look at the world like a movie, a feature film. You will see every activity. After some time you will see the essence of the activity. Like now I am talking to you. First you hear the words. Then there is an unseen energy transferred through the words which you will start catching. E.g. the wind is blowing. You feel the wind blowing on your body and also start feeling its energy. You will slowly spontaneously shift into the energy field. Then you start understanding the realities because what we see, hear and sometimes experience is not the truth. There is something beyond it. There is a huge masterplan behind visiting this place now. All of these people came together. We often fail to see it because we do not experience things in the energy plane but after some time you will see only the blueprint, energy. And you will say, “Oh, this is how it’s happening.”
There are states of samadhi. Samadhi means still mind. First is you have a question and you must have an answer. Once you have the answer, your mind is still. Later, you have a question and you know there is an answer, even if the answer doesn’t come, your mind is still. Like that, evolution happens in stages and you will feel your body as a big peaceful organism like a universe. After that, even if you do not feel your body, you are still peaceful.
So these are stages and the beginning is to be always conscious about your words and actions. Awareness is being conscious of your consciousness. And this is the medicine for all of the questions. It is actually being conscious about your life, your talking, moving of your hands… everything. Soon you will start hugging you, embracing you.
Once you arrive in these states and look outside, there is nothing except you. You will stop seeing different faces. You can’t see anything except you. All different expressions of you and different flavours, sometimes salty, sometimes sweet, sour… it’s all you. This is the truth, all these are expressions- be it Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, Allah- are one consciousness.
There is no difference between you and me, except physical. Because we are all one consciousness, each of us chose a different set of experiences, so there are different bodies.
We are two pedestrians. When you ask a question, I give an answer, I play a role of a teacher. When I ask a question and you answer, then you play a role of a teacher. It’s all roleplay, all relative. When you look at this larger picture, there will be only love. There is nothing else. Just love will be overflowing because it’s all ‘me’. Hence I always say before any spiritual activity, first and foremost is, “Who am I?” Am I this person asking for information, am I this person asking for food? Keep asking this question. The more you ask this question and explore yourself, the more amazed you will be with information that comes from within. It will be much more real than any external information.
I’ll tell you a story.
A story about CONSCIOUSNESS
The point is we can never underestimate anybody. We can never say somebody is higher or lower. All are the same.
There was a great, powerful saint, who had seen god. One very illiterate man asked him, “Can I serve you?” This man accompanied the saint and served him. Once he asked the saint, “You always talk about God. How does God look like?” The saint answered, “You won’t understand it. Don’t ask.” He asked again, “How do you see God? How does God look like?” Again the saint answered, “Don’t ask such questions, you haven’t learnt anything, you wouldn’t understand.” This went on for some time and finally the saint got fed up. Then he said, “Do you see that buffalo? That is how God looks like.” The man was surprised, “Oh, that is God!” They went on further. One day they were walking along a very narrow street. The man was carrying a rope in his hand. The saint passed through the way and this man got stuck. The saint asked, “Why are you not following me?” He said, “I can cross, but God cannot cross.” (laughter) So the saint asked, “Where is God?” “Behind me, the buffalo.” And he was pulling and pulling but it couldn’t come through this narrow way. Than the saint realised that this man has actually realised God. And that he is much more advanced than him.
The saint was egoistic but the man following him wasn’t. When we have nothing inside, the whole energy fills in. God is everywhere but we will experience God within us in our capacity. This saint was joking when he said the buffalo is God. But the man who was following him realised God in that form.
God is every form, but we connect to the supreme differently. The best way is by connecting to yourself, by being aware of your activities and words and always being present. This is the most practical thing I can give you.
Unfortunately spiritual world is full of rituals now. I doubt whether rituals can take you to higher dimension unless you are actually involved and experiencing it.
Being spiritual means being natural and thus absolutely powerful. You are neither less nor more than anybody. You are absolutely perfect the way you created yourself. This shaking hands with yourself is very important. Once you are clear and connected to yourself, you will let go of everything. Because you have nothing to store. The ego element will be very low and the humility will be very high.
Mirrors on the road
Q: How many real mirrors do we have on the road, like you?
A: Many. Anybody who crossed over becomes a mirror. When you have nothing to do with the world, you are the mirror. Some people choose to leave the world. But some people stay on just to reflect you to you.
When we say, “I am so-and-so,” we are talking about the egoistic us. It is identification. Second is when we pretend that we are somebody when we aren’t in reality but start believing in it. It is pretension.
A Story of Atmananda
There was Atmananda, a wondering monk with many followers but he didn’t give the status of a disciple to anybody. Some people stayed on for some time, some people came and left. After some time the number of people increased. He never used to sit down and teach things. He would just live and people connected to his consciousness and became flexible. The more flexible you are in the world, the more spiritual you are. This was exactly the message he was giving to the world. He was sitting among many people following him, and whatever little food comes to him, they would share and eat. So everything is related to what is available. Even when Jesus would walk, sometimes there was no food, and otherwise when there was food, everybody shared it.
One day Atmananda was walking along the street with about 10-15 people. Suddenly he turned to one man in the group. He said, “Go to that alcohol shop and have your drinks.” The follower panicked, “Swami, what are you saying? I don’t need any alcohol.” He said, “You need alcohol. I don’t. Unless you go you cannot follow me.” He went to the shop and others started walking. He never stopped anywhere. Another follower asked him, “Why did you send this guy to the alcohol shop?” Atmananda replied, “He follows me, but thinks about alcohol all the time. He can get nothing from me. If he does not love to follow me, or he is not connected to my consciousness, it’s an absolute waste of time. You should finish what you are supposed to finish and then come. By the time it will be ok.”
Many people in the spiritual world are like that. They follow somebody just for something, but their mind is elsewhere on other things. Hence so many people are not evolving. They just shift from one guru or path to the other but do not progress because there is no clear intention. Spirituality should never be a pastime. It should be a part of your existence.
So there are numerous mirrors, but sometimes we do not see them. E.g. what does a person see when they look at me? Physical form, the way I talk, the way I respond; but how many actually see the consciousness where I am operating from, where I am coming from? The moment you start connecting beyond the physical form, beyond expressions and words- that moment you start connecting to the truth. That is why you should feel, not look. Feeling reveals truth, looking reveals differences. There are many mirrors, but some are not even interacting with the society. Once I met a kriya yogi, who was learning from a master a technique for not having to breathe so that he could reach his Guru.
Liberation is very simple. How much are you contributing to the world, makes your liberation. You can be giving not only money; it can be your time, love, energy, whatever. If you continuously contribute to the world, you start feeling liberation because selflessness establishes itself.
Whenever people talk about my Guru, his Guru, etc. I feel like laughing. Because that is all one Guru, numerous expressions. You connect to what you like and nobody can object to it. What you are actually connecting to is yourself through that mirror.
Q: I am interested in the notion of acceptance. But there are some things I refuse to accept.
A: There is a saying, “Whatever you experience from the world is part of you.” Rejection/ non-acceptance of something is sitting inside you. This is exactly you need to introspect. Acceptance is a spontaneous thing. When you have nothing to do with something, you accept it. When you have something to do with something, then you have conditions. If you accept yourself 100%, the whole world will accept you. You should never judge yourself or others because we do not know why a person behaves in a particular way. So stop judging yourself. Don’t criticise yourself, don’t compare yourself with others.
E.g. sometimes you feel you made a mistake. So what? Accept the mistakes. Accept everything. Then you will say, ok, I fell down, tomorrow I may walk further. So everything is relative. There is nothing which will pull you down except yourself, except your mind. Please understand it is you who is creating your every day. All the teachers, masters are reflecting you like a mirror- “Look here, this is the real you.” Not ‘you’ that you see in the mirror, who you think you are or what others say.
Finally, stop expecting things from yourself. Whatever you can deliver, accept it that way, “This is my capacity.” I am not saying not to do anything. Do your best and accept that. Maybe I or another person will say this is not good enough. That is not your problem. It is their opinion.
So acceptance is spontaneous when you do not except, judge, criticise, compare. Then you understand you are a total universe. You are everything. The whole universe is based on you. Minus you there is no universe. Because you are creating your own universe. I’ll tell you a story about the universe you create.
A Story of the universe you create
Saints gave a very tasty fruit to Lord Shiva. Shiva decided to give it to his sons, Lord Ganesh and Lord Subramanya.
So Lord Shiva and his wife Parvati are sitting and he called Lord Ganesha and Lord Subramanya. He said, “Whoever goes around the universe three times and comes back here first, will have this fruit.” Lord Subramanya immediately climbed his peacock and started travelling around the universe. Lord Ganesha went around his mother and father three times and said, “You are my universe.” So he was given the prize. When Lord Subramaya actually travelled around the universe three times and came back, fruit had already been consumed.
This shows your universe depends on who you are. What does that say? Never judge, criticise, compare, or underestimate anybody. Acceptance happens. This is why I’m saying use this day to connect to yourself. When you are in my energy field, it’s a different energy. Use this energy to go inside. Connect to yourself and you will realise you and I are one. Otherwise ego will always say there is a difference.
Transcribed by Biljana Vozarevic
Proof-read by Aviral Srivastava