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Welcome to Mohanji Speaks. Hello friends, hope you are doing well.

Today, I want to share with you a couple of thoughts. I’ll come to the point straight away without much ado. Before I start, a story that came to my mind. I read this when I was in my teens, but it stayed with me. This is from the Sherlock Holmes series by Arthur Conan Doyle. I’m sure most of you would have read most of his work. Here we have the super-intelligent Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson who is always fascinated by the intelligence of Sherlock Holmes. Sherlock Holmes has the ability to see what others don’t see usually, which helps in solving mysteries effortlessly. This always fascinated. Dr. Watson.

One day in that story Watson is asking Sherlock Holmes, “How do you have this clarity, this intelligence? How do you manage this?” Sherlock Holmes answered quite matter-of-factly. He said to Watson, “My mind is uncluttered. What information I need, that’s the only one that I store. In other words, I only store information that I can use, that I need. I do not store anything random in my mind, so I can retrieve it effortlessly.”

Now you consider your mind – how much of information have you collected and stored in your mind, which is pretty much useless, or pretty much irrelevant when time passes by. The information that I have in my mind is always fresh and usable. We have so many different information entering our system, entering our minds every day. Politics, sports, various things of life we are interested in, and we collect that information, and we store them without our knowledge. While the information that is essential for us to remember gets mixed up with the information that we have collected and stored unconsciously, or spontaneously. What happens eventually, everything gets mixed up and to retrieve something at the right time becomes impossible, you don’t remember. The lack of memory in most cases is because of the clutter in our minds. It’s because we have stored too much. Just like Sherlock Holmes said, if you store only what you really need in your life, what is essential in your life, you can prevent memory loss. Memory loss is usually connected to an over-burdened mind, too much data, too much information that causes clutter.

This was the thought which came to me this morning, which I thought I’ll share with you, and it continued to another dimension. This is a thought about the wastage of time. How much time do we waste in life, chasing rainbows, illusions, and illusory things? Quite a lot. If we can avoid chasing rainbows and stay with the reality of everyday existence, life will be uncluttered.

We get fascinated by others’ stories, opinions, concepts, temptations. We chase them, and we deviate, taking detours to chase them, to find them, or to experience them. And often we don’t get there because they don’t exist. Rainbows are beautiful from a distance. But you try going towards it, when you reach closer it’s just water vapour, pretty much invisible. Many things that you see from a distance do not have value when you come closer to it. Like when we do not have something, we attach a lot of value to that thing. But when you really get it, it loses value. This is our life. This is how we live every moment.

This understanding might help you to reposition yourself to choose what is relevant and what is not so relevant in life. If we choose what is relevant in life, based on practical, realistic criteria, we can ignore the irrelevant things spontaneously. We are what occupies our mind. What occupies our mind holds us, molds us. So, we are what occupies our mind. This is our choice. We can occupy our mind with high elevated thoughts, thoughts of grandeur, thoughts of higher elevation, thoughts of super-conscious states connected to a Master, thoughts of the Masters. We can occupy our minds with great things, but there will be struggles, struggles because of our desires, our native laziness, our tendencies, and inclinations. They will all try to pull left and right, up and down. We have got to tackle them because they are living with us. They are like family members who have an interest in you, who believe that this is what you’re born for. Or these tendencies are a part of your system and you can’t avoid them.

What occupies your mind makes you. If this understanding is clear, you can choose to fill your mind with the right thoughts. In fact, you don’t have control over thoughts, thoughts just happen spontaneously with time. But we can choose to occupy our mind, engage to apply our mind on the positive, regenerative, and rejuvenating matter. Such information will enhance you and enhance the world around you; so that the world reciprocates that back to you. What you give to the world, you get from the world. When you give yourself to the world, the world gives itself to you. This control is in everybody, you can all choose to do this. You can control these factors. It’s an attitude. So we can definitely choose to be different, to be ourselves. Connect to our highest possibilities and express that to the world. Our value always is what we give to the world.
Today I would like to tell you about one aspect of our life. Just throw some light on it, so that you could ponder on it.

We have so many people around us who love us unconditionally, who care for us, who respect us, those who have value for us, or we have value for them, and those to whom we have a value, they value us. Often, we ignore those people in life, and we try to impress or chase people who do not really care about us, who are indifferent towards us. I’m sure all of you have experienced that. There are people, who really love you, care for you, but they’re insignificant in your life, or you don’t care, you’re indifferent towards them. And there are people who really don’t care about you, they don’t love you, but you really want their affection and you do everything possible so that they love you, they accept you, which won’t happen. And the result is a disappointment. Usually or sometimes, it so happens that we’ve hurt the people who love us because our mind is occupied on what we do not have. We totally ignore what we have. This is one of the tragedies of existence.

All of us have some people who really care for us. And all of us have people whom we love and want them to care for us. But due to whatever reason, they are indifferent towards us. What should you do, ideally, what is the right thing to do? Ignore those who are indifferent, even if you love them. If you would like them to love you, or like them to be affectionate towards you, but if they are indifferent towards you, ignore them completely. Respect them, love them, but ignore them. And ignore their impact in your life so that you won’t get hurt by their indifference, which will help your self-esteem. Meanwhile, focus on those who really love you, care for you, and give them back, reciprocate the same. If we live our lives in this manner, that means, love those who love us. That means you reciprocate love and we ignore those who do not love us or those who are indifferent towards us. And don’t analyze the reason; it could be simply unmatched frequency. Frequency is not matching, that’s why they can’t communicate with you. That’s probably why they don’t understand your love, care, or your need for their attention. So, ignore them. Accept, respect, and deeply love those who really care for you. Do not hurt them ever so that your life will be stable, you will have a better balance in life, and you will feel good because you are reciprocating evenly, the emotions that you receive. Imagine you are getting love from somebody, but you are giving back hatred – that is already an imbalance. If you get love, give love, reciprocate evenly, and that will stabilize you.

I leave you with these thoughts, how to unclutter your mind, how to prioritize, and how to balance yourself in society. Think it over. Share it if you liked it. And we’ll meet again later.

This is Mohanji for you.

Transcribed by Ulla Bernholdt

Proofread by Shyama Jeyaseelan

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Welcome to Mohanji Speaks.

My friends, we have spoken about so many things in the past few days. Today, I would like to speak to you about a real-life incident that happened in my life, about 15 years ago; I was not known as Mohanji at that time.

I met one guy, a very, very successful businessman, and also a model. He has also acted in films. Very handsome, very successful, has his own yacht, various cars, and so many things. I met him at a party, and he somehow liked me and he said, “Can I speak to you?”

So we fixed a time, and then he picked me up from my office. He drove the car, and I was sitting in the car, a very, very expensive car. We went to the seaside and we sat in an isolated cafe. I ordered a juice; he ordered some drink, and we were sitting just looking at the sunset. I didn’t bring up any conversation, as usual, I kept quiet; most of the time I don’t talk. So, I kept quiet. And he asked me, out of the blue without any introduction, “You’re a chronic introvert, aren’t you?” I said, “Yes!” “Me too, I can’t speak to people. I don’t know how to interact with people. Whatever I am showing in this world outside, is just to camouflage my helplessness; I am always helpless. What I liked in you is, you have tremendous strength in your eyes. When I looked at your eyes, I felt a lot of strength. Somewhere, is a will of steel or something like that; but you looked very vulnerable in this whole party. I didn’t come and talk to you easily; then I kept looking at you and I realized that I must talk to you. So that’s how I came to you.”

Then he started telling me his story. A broken family, sexual abuse in childhood; he couldn’t speak to anybody. He had wealth, his parents had wealth, but most of the wealth was stolen by his own uncles. He was humiliated in school, bullied in school; his girlfriend, first girlfriend, he had a girlfriend at the age of 15, and she cheated on him, cheated in the sense, she just went away without telling him. Like that. He had a series of troubles and problems to say, and he started crying.

Luckily, we were the only two people in that small cafeteria; and nobody was looking at us, so it was easier. And he said, “You know what, I didn’t have anybody to talk to. I went to a few counselors. I tried to talk to some religious people, and they only gave me some kind of solutions like, you do this offering in this church, go to this place or that place. But nothing worked. Basically, I’m still crying inside. Many times, I thought of committing suicide. To the outside world, I’m very rich; I have a lot of wealth. I have organizations, people are working for me, but I’m so insecure; I don’t know how I live another day.” Then he said, “You know what, whenever I look at myself; I see ugliness. I do not feel that I’m worth it; I have a very, very big problem with my self-esteem. I have complexes; I’m hiding all of that with my money, and with certain things which will camouflage me from all this.

But I’m really afraid of the world. I’m really afraid of the people; I fear that they will hurt me. I have relationships, but I’m afraid of women. I feel they will betray me; I can’t trust anybody. I don’t know who to trust. I don’t know who to believe, to be with. I have a big ocean of friends, as you saw, but they are not my friends. They are just like acquaintances. And I don’t feel anything for anybody; I am pretty lonely. I did marry twice; it didn’t work, I left it. I do have friends and girls; I do have relationships; I do have sexuality, but I don’t trust myself. I don’t trust anybody; I don’t trust my wealth; I don’t trust any of the things I have, my companies, nothing! I have literally picked up myself from a disaster situation where my uncles were taking away our wealth when my parents died. And I built up everything from ashes, but I did build up. But I don’t feel proud, I don’t feel anything.”

It was an utter sorry state. How to respond? How to react? How to make him accept himself, which was a big question mark. He has already been to the most expensive consultants of the world; mood changers, game-changers, motivational people; he’s been everywhere. And he couldn’t really get anything out of it.

He said, “I had various experiences with various people, I paid immense money for that. It was only for some time; there was no transformation inside.” Then I asked him, “How do you think I can make a difference? I’m a chronic introvert. I’m not a motivational speaker; I’ve never motivated people that way. I lead a life of purity and honesty as much as possible. I have my vulnerabilities. I’m also afraid of the crowd because the crowd has hurt me; people have betrayed me just like you said. How do you think I can help you?”

Then he said, “One thing we have in common; you are an introvert, I am an introvert, so we can understand each other. I don’t need a solution right now. I’m not asking you for a solution, but I’m just asking you for some clarity.”

So, I said, “The clarity is you. That’s it!” He said, “That’s it?”” Yes, that’s it. It’s you. Whatever you think you are, that’s exactly what you’re experiencing.” “So, how do I make a difference?” I said, “Through acceptance. The past has to be put in its place, buried if possible.” Then he asked, “How do I trust people?” “I said, “Trust yourself, that’s only the only person you need to trust. Outside people are outside people, you have them and you do not have them. It’s basically you. When you are awake, you have them. When you’re not awake, when you’re sleeping, you don’t have them. So there is only one person you need to trust, it is you.”

He asked me, “Is it that simple?” I said, “I think so.” He asked me, “How do you handle your life?” I said, “I don’t want to bring my story to you now, because you’ve been telling your story, which was quite intense, so why should I tell you mine?” He said, “No, no tell, I want to hear!”

So, I told a bit about ‘the tragedies’ I experienced in my life: neglected childhood kind of thing, a bit of feeling unwanted, then difficult to position as an introverted person in the society; and then being forcefully extroverted with activities just to prove to myself; and of course, finding some success there as well. Then lack of direction, lack of goals, lack of vision, a kind of abandoned state in youth. Then jobs, some success, a lot of hard work, working hours and hours, self-destructive levels of working, and finally, finding some success in work – recognition. Betrayals in work, competition, jealousy, those kinds of things. Then a marriage that didn’t work, loss of a child, loss of property, loss of wealth, loss of job, and physical ailments. Then trusting people; they betraying, stabbing from behind. Giving everything to people to make them happy; because I believed that it’s my responsibility to make everybody happy who loves me, and they took it for granted. Some people literally betrayed using the trust that I had in them. All these things, it’s been a strange life.

I said, “I have always been alone. I walked alone. And whenever I felt people were trying to own me, I ran away.”

He said, “Yes, I did the same. I’m afraid of people owning me. This is what I wanted to talk to you. I don’t like people owning me.”

I said, “Because nobody can own us. It’s not a problem; it’s not a fault. You cannot own anybody nor can anybody own us.”

“Yes! Yes! Yes! That makes sense to me!”

I said, “Yes, that’s the truth.” Then he said, “What else?”

I said, “It’s you. It’s you and you and you! I don’t exist for you.”

He looked into my eyes, “What do you mean?”

I said, “You’re seeing me now. After four or five hours, where am I? Where are you? You don’t even know where I’m living, do you? We have no guarantee we will meet again. Do you think so? Do you believe it?”

He said, “Yes, yes, there is a possibility we may not meet again.”

And I said, “That’s a reality. What is my value in your life right now? I’m just pointing one finger to you. I am telling you to look at yourself. You are beautiful. Trust yourself. You can only trust yourself. Don’t betray yourself. You cannot trust the world. The world has its highs and lows, ups, and downs. The world has its moods, its ethics, its character, consciousness, and levels of acceptance. Nothing can be guaranteed from this world. But we saw all our insecurities; all of our complexes, all our fears. We have seen them, we experienced them, and we are experiencing them, even now. Look into my eyes closely, what do you see?”

He said, “My own reflection.” I said, “That’s the only truth. You are alive, you exist. That’s all you need to know. Now let’s go. Let’s part.” By that time, it was about 7 pm. He said, “I’ll drop you.” I said, “Yes, just drop me at the bus stop, I’ll catch a bus.” He drove me to the bus stop. While traveling he said, “I want to give you something. I asked him, “What?” “A cheque!” he said. I asked, “For what?” “For giving me time, and I feel good; I’m sure I will change. Thank you for your time.” And then he wanted to give me a blank cheque. He said you can write your amount. It doesn’t matter. I said, “Thank you. I don’t need your cheque; thank you for the drink, thank you for the time we are together. When you want, you come; but don’t come, I would say, you find yourself if you can.”

Then he told me, “One day I will come to you; that time, you will own me. “I laughed and I said, “I can’t own anybody. Not even myself.” He said, “No! One day, I will come to be with you, to work with you. I know you will become famous; I can see that in your eyes. I have this acumen for knowing people because I do business. I know you will become very rich, very powerful one day. You will be famous. I’ll be with you at that time.” I said, ”Thank you.” And we parted.

I hope you enjoyed this story. Think about it. This is our life too. All the best.